Regarding #2, the PS3 can surf any DLNA server on the network. Coherence seems to be the most popular free one not counting WMC.
http://coherence.beebits.net/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digital...twork_Alliance
It still plays in its own player, though, so you'll probably have the good 'ol codec hell that you are used to with WMC. I think that limits you to MP2 and MP4
I have Nero Media Home, which got bundled with some other Nero stuff I bought. It supposedly transcodes any format it can read into the necessary format for delivery to the PS3 on demand. But, I haven't really f'ed around with it at all.