1. The emissions test guy starts laughing as soon as you pull onto the rollers.
yeah but only in the impala...
2. You can't drive your car in the rain.
not even my awd works at full boost
3. Your 'significant other' is afraid to drive your car.
of course, she knows id kill her if something happened.
5. You spend more on tires than on food.
yep...
6. You spend more on car insurance than on house payments.
not yet
7. You look in a state police car and see a picture of your car taped to the dash.
actually one of the california hp had a picture of my impala on his desktop on his computer and pulled me over in it to let me know.
9. You have to go to the track to buy gas.
i have to go to sutro 76... but they selll it at the track too.
10. Your mechanic names the new wing of his shop after you.
when i got the impala painted councours added an awning to the front of the shop... becaues of how much profit they made from the job.
14. Red signal lights shift to green as you're approaching then shift back to red as you're receding.
that would be sooooo fuckin badass, however the blood would leave your eyes first, so how would you tell?
23. Your 'significant other' won't even ride in the car.
one girl i dated couldnt stand the impala, it was too loud for her to think.
24 There is no possible way to "sneak out" of your neighborhood at 6 am.
nope, not even on the bike
25. Your pets scramble for their hiding spots as soon as the garage door is opened. (Pets, and all the neighbors...)
my spider hates my car... alot.
27. Fuel is delivered to your home in 55 gallon drums
wouldnt that be nice...
28. You carry earplugs in your car.(doesn't everybody???)
me too...
30. You find out that side mirrors don't hold up at speeds exceeding 145 mph.
i fold mine in at the strip... does that count.
31. Young children cling to their mommies in fear when you round the corner.
only if my bov opens. lol.
34. The UPS guy took to taking Steroids so he could keep up with your shipments.
no but his name is brad and he leaves things for me even when hes not suppposed to.
35. The Fed Ex guy had a nervous breakdown.
fedex sucks.
41. Your exhaust pipes are larger in diameter than your driveline.
yep on both cars!
42. Your fuel pump flows enough to water a golf course.
455 lph... in the impalas tank with an aux pump in case it fails.