I'm a smartass too. Hence my title.
It's not personal, I just have to read message boards for a couple hours a day and I get tired of caps lock/horrible spelling/failure with grammar/ mAd TytE l33t speek y0 and all the rest of that garbage on the internet. Don't take offense to anything I post in response to you. If I really didn't like you, I wouldn't post at all because I really hate stupid internet drama.
Anyways, welcome to the club, I hope you stick around. I'd offer you some tech advice like you were seeking, but frankly I'm no dirt and rally guru. I'm a tarmac guy, despite my subaru enthusiasm. Basically, keep it tall, soft, and like Tyson said, tires are key if you're serious about hitting the unpaved stuff.
Oh, and it's a doorag, and it's on Emilio Estevez in case you hadn't noticed.
Men at Work was the swan song of bad/good 80's movie cheese.
