I just realized I'm a racist... - Subaru Enthusiasts Car Club of the Sierras

sperry · 2005-08-31, 03:05 PM

...at least when it comes to M&Ms. I've got a strict eating order, based on a color superiority scale. I eat the inferior M&M's 1st, working my way up to the most elite.

Here's the ranking, and why:

blue - The blue M&M's are the worst scum of the M&M universe. They came in with their fancy new color and wiped out the tan M&M race. The blue M&M is like some gay hold-over from the Easter bag that somehow inflitrated my beloved bag of regular M&Ms. Fuck the new guys... they die 1st.

red - The red M&M's are only slightly better than the blues, but that's just because they've been around longer. Nevermind that hiatus when they were gone because they caused cancer. The red M&M's die next.

brown - The only thing brown's got going for 'em is that they're an original color. Just ignore the brown M&M's complete lack of originality. They're basically uncolored... they're made out of chocolate, and look that way. The brown M&M's die third.

tan - This is when the tan's used to get eaten. But because of those dirty blues, the tan's are now extinct. The tan's used to be the bread and butter M&M's. Still not creative, but they were at least a little more "upscale" than the browns in that they at least tried to look like carmel or something other than plain chocolate.

orange - With the demise of the tans, the orange M&M's have become the "average citizen" of the M&M world. They're a little bit brash and bright, but at least they try. The oranges are consumed 4th.

yellow - Yellow is like orange, but they spruced it up a bit. Yellows are vibrant without being brash... like little drops of sunlight. And they've been that way long before those Skittles imposters show up with their "Taste the Rainbow" line of propaganda bullshit. Yellows hold out second to last... the penultimate M&M if you will.

green - Of course green is the top M&M. Their aphrodisiactic ability is legendary! When someone offers you an M&M and you get a green, well you just came out on top (and in some cases it means you have to bang the person that gave it to you). The green M&M is the most elite. It owns all the oil companies and media outlets, and controls the M&M's government. They're like the Michael Jordans of M&M basketball... or the Michael Schumacher of M&M F1 (assuming they don't have to suffer on those crappy Bridgestones). Yes the green M&M is the champion. They die last.

AtomicLabMonkey · 2005-08-31, 03:10 PM

Wow... you need to take some time off work, dude.

sti deede · 2005-08-31, 03:10 PM

:ROTFL: Classic. I like blue best. But I wish there was a cherry blossom pink to take over the brown. Then it would move equal to green, being as the pink makes one just as horny green.

SlickNick112 · 2005-08-31, 03:31 PM

Or spend that time finishing up the results from the last auto-x........

Dean · 2005-08-31, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sti deede

:ROTFL: ...

Ah, if only that worked. But no, Scott refuses to give us a ROTFL guy becasue of his feet. Talk about prejudice. Aparently Scott is threatened by animated gifs with LARGE FEET in some way. What would Frued say about that. And not surprisingly, they also appear to resemble his second favorite M&M color. Makes you go Hmmmm. Eating the M&Ms that is.

SlickNick112 · 2005-08-31, 03:33 PM

You know what they say about M&M's with big feet.............

They wear big shoes!!

tysonK · 2005-08-31, 04:31 PM

I eat the edges of KIT-KAT's first so I'm kinda of a chocolate structural terrorist.

I eat M&M in ranking also after I pour them in my hand I don't sort the whole bag though.

M3n2c3 · 2005-08-31, 07:31 PM

So what happens when you have those Star Wars M&Ms?

Mmm. . . the dark side is bittersweeeet. . .

sp00ln · 2005-08-31, 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AtomicLabMonkey

Wow... you need to take some time off work, dude.

Um, yeah.

Libila · 2005-08-31, 10:23 PM

This is one of the few cases were a "lol" is in order.

MattR · 2005-08-31, 10:45 PM

This is the worst thread of all time.

MPREZIV · 2005-09-01, 06:23 AM

My head hurts now. I think it's just a little too early in the AM for me to be thinking this deeply about friggin' candy.

Deep Scott. Deep.

2005-08-31, 03:05 PM	#1
sperry The Doink Real Name: Scott Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Portland, OR Posts: 20,335 Car: '09 OBXT, '02 WRX, '96 Miata Class: PDX/TT-6 The way out is through	I just realized I'm a racist... ...at least when it comes to M&Ms. I've got a strict eating order, based on a color superiority scale. I eat the inferior M&M's 1st, working my way up to the most elite. Here's the ranking, and why: blue - The blue M&M's are the worst scum of the M&M universe. They came in with their fancy new color and wiped out the tan M&M race. The blue M&M is like some gay hold-over from the Easter bag that somehow inflitrated my beloved bag of regular M&Ms. Fuck the new guys... they die 1st. red - The red M&M's are only slightly better than the blues, but that's just because they've been around longer. Nevermind that hiatus when they were gone because they caused cancer. The red M&M's die next. brown - The only thing brown's got going for 'em is that they're an original color. Just ignore the brown M&M's complete lack of originality. They're basically uncolored... they're made out of chocolate, and look that way. The brown M&M's die third. tan - This is when the tan's used to get eaten. But because of those dirty blues, the tan's are now extinct. The tan's used to be the bread and butter M&M's. Still not creative, but they were at least a little more "upscale" than the browns in that they at least tried to look like carmel or something other than plain chocolate. orange - With the demise of the tans, the orange M&M's have become the "average citizen" of the M&M world. They're a little bit brash and bright, but at least they try. The oranges are consumed 4th. yellow - Yellow is like orange, but they spruced it up a bit. Yellows are vibrant without being brash... like little drops of sunlight. And they've been that way long before those Skittles imposters show up with their "Taste the Rainbow" line of propaganda bullshit. Yellows hold out second to last... the penultimate M&M if you will. green - Of course green is the top M&M. Their aphrodisiactic ability is legendary! When someone offers you an M&M and you get a green, well you just came out on top (and in some cases it means you have to bang the person that gave it to you). The green M&M is the most elite. It owns all the oil companies and media outlets, and controls the M&M's government. They're like the Michael Jordans of M&M basketball... or the Michael Schumacher of M&M F1 (assuming they don't have to suffer on those crappy Bridgestones). Yes the green M&M is the champion. They die last. __________________ Is you is, or is you ain't, my con-stit-u-ints?

2005-08-31, 03:10 PM	#2
AtomicLabMonkey Nightwalker Real Name: Austin Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Oshkosh, WI Posts: 4,063 Car: '13 WRX YGBSM	Wow... you need to take some time off work, dude. __________________ "None of you seem to understand. I'm not locked in here with you.. you're locked in here with me."

2005-08-31, 03:31 PM	#4
SlickNick112 EJ251 Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Everett, WA Posts: 603 Car: '06 Impreza WRX STi Class: Out of class! I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal. People know me.	Or spend that time finishing up the results from the last auto-x........ __________________ "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " *~Frank Sinatra*

2005-08-31, 03:33 PM	#6
SlickNick112 EJ251 Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Everett, WA Posts: 603 Car: '06 Impreza WRX STi Class: Out of class! I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal. People know me.	You know what they say about M&M's with big feet............. They wear big shoes!! __________________ "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " *~Frank Sinatra*

2005-08-31, 04:31 PM	#7
tysonK warehouse SECCS Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: SoCal... Posts: 6,253 Car: 04 Evo 99 Cadillac Class: street de le mod	I eat the edges of KIT-KAT's first so I'm kinda of a chocolate structural terrorist. I eat M&M in ranking also after I pour them in my hand I don't sort the whole bag though. __________________ Anjali? Anjali?

2005-08-31, 03:10 PM	#3
sti deede EJ205 Real Name: Deede Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Sacramento, CA Posts: 1,789 Car: '96 4runner Class: none.	:ROTFL: Classic. I like blue best. But I wish there was a cherry blossom pink to take over the brown. Then it would move equal to green, being as the pink makes one just as horny green.

2005-08-31, 07:31 PM	#8
M3n2c3 EJ205 Real Name: Jeremiah Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Dayton, NV Posts: 1,888 Car: 2005 Impreza 2.5RS, 2000 Forester L Class: RNP sometimes (see motto) "Kids are ruining autocross."	So what happens when you have those Star Wars M&Ms? Mmm. . . the dark side is bittersweeeet. . . __________________ Small red text that looks curious at first glance but is ultimately inconsequential

2005-08-31, 10:23 PM	#10
Libila EJ205 Real Name: Tim Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Reno, NV Posts: 1,384 Car: '94 L	This is one of the few cases were a "lol" is in order.

2005-08-31, 10:45 PM	#11
MattR El Matador Real Name: Matt Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Reno, NV Posts: 10,660 Car: 2012 Toyota Tacoma Class: ?	This is the worst thread of all time. __________________ "Dallas..We have a problem.”

2005-09-01, 06:23 AM	#12
MPREZIV Token Real Name: Le Stig Afrique? Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: sitting next to a big yellow box Posts: 3,589 Car: 2001 Impreza 2.5 RS Class: 05 TDSP No, I won't work on your car. F your car*	My head hurts now. I think it's just a little too early in the AM for me to be thinking this deeply about friggin' candy. Deep Scott. Deep. __________________ "...these condoms have a topical anesthetic to reduce sensitivity, so you can last longer. What a paradox. You can't feel a thing, but you can f*ck for HOURS..."

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
I saw that most racist thing ever today!	MattR	Off Topic Chat	25	2005-10-06 07:49 PM