Carribean > NV

[sperry]

Well I'm back, and although I'm mentally more centered to deal w/ winter, I'm realizing how much I hate it!

Anyway, here's my story:

Saturday, Jan 1, 2005
Reno, NV; Denver, CO; Dallas/Fort-Worth, TX; New Orleans, LA

Deede and I left Eric's place at about 12:30. Deede graciously offered to drive me to the airport at 6 am on the 1st, so she was going to crash at my place. Instead, she was up most the night vomiting a bottle of wine. I didn't get to sleep till about 1:30, so getting up at 5 to make sure everything was in order was tough.



After brushing an inch or two of new snow off Deede's car, we got to the airport at about 6:30. I wait in line for about 90 minutes (the airport was a full-on cluster fuck of people trying to get home from new years and the like...) thinking I'm going to mis my flight, but come to find out it's delayed because the O2 regulator for the cockpit is borked. So the flight's grounded until a plane from SFO gets in at 9:30 w/ the part.

So I clear security and kick it in the terminal waiting for the repairs. Since I know I'm missing my 12:30 pm connecting flight in Denver already, I talk w/ the United rep at the counter and they book me on the 6:30 pm flight, putting me into New Orleans at about 10 pm instead of 4 pm. I make some calls to my friends in NO and let them know what's up and figure I'm all set.

At about 10:30 I'm finally airborn. The flight's pretty bumpy 'cause of the weather, but it smoothed out once we got up to about 30k feet. We landed in Denver w/o a problem. I figure I've got a 4 hour layover, so I grab a bite to eat and take my time. I figure I might as well get my boarding pass so I hit the counter and they tell me "no sir, you're booked on the 6:30 pm flight tomorrow." WTF!?! I tell the lady that I've got to be on a cruise ship at 1 pm tomorrow, leaving Denver at 6:30 isn't exactly the best way to make that appointment. She tells me that *every* flight on *all airlines* to NO are booked until that 6:30 pm flight, and that all I can do is come back to the terminal at 6 pm and try to fly standby. Knowing standby is about as likely as getting abducted by aliens that are nice enough to drop be off in NO after the anal probe, I call my friends in NO to let them know what's up (they start checking flight on the internet for me), then bounce to the customer service desk, which is somehow totally empty.

At this point I'm thinking that renting a car and driving from Denver to New Orleans is my best shot to make my ship... so basically I think I'm totally fucked. The woman at the service counter turns out to be *awesome*. She was very helpful and really went to work for me. In conjunction with about 5 phone calls from my friends that were scouring expedia and travelocity, etc, we were able to put together an alternate plan: Denver to Dallas/Fort-Worth at 5:30 pm on Delta, and DFW to NO at 6 am the next day on American, putting me in NO at about 8 am the day of the cruise. So I hop the flight to Dallas.

Now, if you've ever been to DFW, you know it's the worst airport EVAR. It's got 5 terminals, each one is about the size of Reno/Tahoe International. I fly into terminal E. Checking the map (and not realizing how big the airport actually is) I see that American has terminals A and C, and United has B. I figure I'll head over to A to check in for my next flight, then walk to B to get United to pay for a hotel room for me. I hop on the bus to terminal A, and it's like a 15 minute ride on the freeway to get there from terminal E... now I'm realizing how big this place is. I get to the American counter and the guy checking me in is like "actually, we've got a flight leaving to New Orelans at 9:20, if you can get over to C *right now* you can make it." It's like 8:50, but going for it and arriving in NO at 10 pm would certainly be better than having to spend the night in Dallas.

I book the flight and ask the clerk what's the best way to get to C... should I get on the bus again, or just run through the terminals. I guess the guy thought I was in better shape than I'm in, 'cause he told me to go through security in terminal A, then run from A to C and pick up a ride from one of the golf-carts that patrol the terminals.

So I duck into the terminal A security area, and there isn't a single person in line! Jackpot... except guess what, I'm tagged for an "additional security check". So I get the garret wand slapped on my junk, and have to completely empty my carry-on and go through everything. I'm finally through security at about 9:05, and I know the flight started boarding like 5 minutes ago so it's Carl Lewis time.

At DFW, each terminal is a half circle, and I'm right in the middle of A. So I have to sprint about 15 gates, which I would guess is like a 1/4 mile. While I'm running I call my friends in NO to let them know I'm trying to make a flight tonight. After running half of terminal A, I hit the tunnel that runs between A and B/C. It's like another 1/4 mile long, but has like 5 people movers in there. So I'm sprinting down the people movers... which is awesome since it feels like you're running at 20 mph. The big issue is making sure to slow down enough between the movers because if you hit the static ground at that speed there's no way to get your legs caught up and you eat copious amounts of shit.

So I get to terminal C. Each terminal has 30 gates, and I need gate C30... so I've got a 50/50 chance that my gate will be right there... well I dart into the terminal, and of course the 1st gate: C1. It's now about 9:15, and I've got about half a mile to run to make the gate. By now I'm ass-out tired (since I'm in such wonderful shape with a desk job and all) but I'm still trying to run. As I'm going I'm passing golf cart after golf cart full of people going the other way. Finally around gate C12 I see one going my way, but just as I get there some lady gets on and the guy turns around to take here to baggage claim, despite my yelling about how late I am. I just about started cussing her out, since I'm obviously as late as shit, and near to having a corronary... but noooooo she can't walk for 5 minutes to the baggage claim area. (Luckily I found out later that tram was hit by a forklift and the woman was impaled. She died three days later in the hospital, alone because her family missed their flight to get there in time.) Anyway, I finally got a ride at gate C27... yes that's right I sat down and rode for about 40 feet to my gate. The people at the gate phone down to the plane and get them to hold the flight.

I get aboard the plane, and I'm sweating, wheasing from my asthma, and realising just how bad of shape I'm in. Some frat-boy tool is in my seat so I have to make him move. Then I realize that *everyone* on the plane is a frat-boy tool. The flight's full of Auburn fans on their way to the Sugar Bowl. So my flight is basically 2 hours of listening to shit talking about a sport I don't really follow. No matter, since I made it to New Orleans at about 10 pm, only 6 hours, an extra flight, and extra city, and a 10 minute mile, behind schedule.

I get into New Orleans, and meet my friends Glen (the NO resident), Dan, Ryan and June at the airport... the only person missing from the cruise lineup is Glen's sister Courtney who stayed at Glen's apartment.

After a little wandering around looking for my luggage we found that it made it on that 6:30 pm United flight that I was supposed to take on stand-by. So it had been just waiting for me for like 30 minutes. We grab the luggage and head out to Glen's dope-ass Cadillac (black STS on 20" chrome rims... pimp for real).



We roll the Caddy through the most wonderful thing I've ever seen: a drive through daiquiri stand. That's right... a drive through for alcoholic beverages. I'm not allowed to order for myself, since my friends are paying for me. They, being the assholes they are, order me a "Bremuda Triangle"... as best I can tell it's a mixture of gasoline, windex, and crushed ice. It litterally made my tongue go numb... not like cold-numb, like chemically numb. They gave me 10 minutes (the length of the ride home) to finish it... I didn't quite get it down in time... that shit was *strong*!



We get to Glen's place and I'm already close to hammered, since the last time I ate (aside from pretzels) was in Denver at like noon. We kick it long enough for me to mess up the tuning on Glen's guitar, then Dan and Ryan decide we need to hit Bourbon Street.



We hop a 2 minute cab ride to the French Quarter party mecca, and hit the street. This place is *nuts*. I've been there before, but all the Sugar Bowl crowds were out partying, so it was pretty crowded... I can't even imaging what it's like during Mardi Gras! We grabbed some "Hand Grenades"... which are lime-esque daiqueries, and are strong as hell.



Drinking our grenades, we kick it on a porch over the street for a bit listening to the AU and VT fans chant at each other. Then we headed down and walked back up Bourbon St. to get a cab. That's when I made my call to Matt that went something like this:

S: "Hey dude!"
M: "Hey, you make it to New Orleans?"
S: "Yeah, I'm on Bourbon St. you bitch!"
M: "You're a bastard! I'm at a bar too..."
S: "...yeah, but I rule more than you, and I'm hella drunk!"
M: "Um okay, have a nice trip."

So we took a cab back to Glen's and were just about to pass out when one of Glen's neighbor's started pounding on his door. Next thing we know we're dealing with two semi-drunk chics that are getting semi-naked... which normally would totally rule, but we were all hammered, and tired, and had to get up in the morning to get to the boat, so we were thankful they only stayed about 20 minutes.



Day 1 Cliff notes:
My flight was delayed that resulted in having to re-route through Dallas/Fort-Worth (the worst airport ever) but I eventually made to to New Orleans in time to get hammered and walk Bourbon Street.

[sperry]

Sunday, Jan 2, 2005
New Orleans, LA; Mississippi River:

The crew got up without too much hang-over drama, mostly because we gave up on getting a New Orleans brunch, and slept in instead. Glen finished up his packing, while the rest of us screwed around and finished up odds-n-ends like adding some songs to June's iPod.

Since Glen's apartment is like 9 blocks from the port, we grabed out stuff and walked across the street to the port's long term parking lot, where we pretened that we had just parked, and hopped on the bus that takes you diretly to the port. The bus became affectionately known as the "Ho Tard" for obvious reasons.



Embarkation wasn't too bad. A little waiting in line, a little prank phone calling the Louisiana Tourism Board to order gumbo. Then we were on board!

The ship we took is the Carinval Conquest, one of their largest ships. This thing was friggen *massive*. Pictures don't do it justice... it's like a huge hotel... think Peppermill, except that it moves under it's own power!


This is a picture of the Conquest's sister ship the Victory that I took when it was anchored next to us at Grand Cayman.

The interior is like a 4 or 5 star hotel... inlayed wood accents, grand piano in the lobby, bars everywhere, restaurants everywhere, swimming pools, casino (that rivals the size of a smaller casino in Reno), piano bar, dance club, and on and on...



The boat has 13 public decks, 0 through 12. We had 3 rooms for the 6 of us on deck 9, aka "Lido Deck". Lido doesn't have many rooms on it, because it's also got 2 swimming pools, 4 spas, a restaurant, several sun-deck areas, a 24-hour pizza counter, 3 bars, a BBQ counter, and the fore-most observation area that's right on top of the bridge. It's basically the pimpest deck on the boat.

Normally for the price we paid, we'd have a room on deck 1 or 2 (which is below the main public decks 3-5), but our travel agent hooked us up and booked us on Lido! In addition, the room that June and I shared was a handicapped room which meant we had a double sized bathroom with a dope-ass shower.



We embarked at about 2 pm and had lunch in the deck 9 restaurant. Then spent the next few hours moving into our new homes (which included hanging the pirate flag in Glen and Courtney's room), and exploring the ship.



Then we went to the manditory safety meeting where we donned our life jackets and acted like asses in the faces of all the people that were scared from watching Titanic too many times.

Afterwards, instead of returning to our cabins, we got drinks with our vests still on in one of the lounges on deck 5.



At about 8 pm, the ship left the docks and we sailed down the Mississippi headed for the Gulf. We got to see some of the river from our table in the main dining restaurant where everyone has a reserved table at their dining time. At dinner we also met our waitress for the cruise, Christina from Romania.

Day 2 Cliff notes:
We snuck through the parking lot to gank a ride on the Ho Tard. Then got on the boat and explored for the afternoon. The boat sailed that evening down the Mississippi River towards the Gulf.

[sperry]

Monday, Jan 3, 2005
Gulf of Mexico:

This was our first "Fun Day at Sea" according to the itineary. Basically, we spent the day sailing from the Mississippi to the tip of Cuba, across the Gulf of Mexico.

The weather out at sea was pretty warm, and got warmer as we head south. Leaving New Orleans it was about 75 degrees, partly cloudy, and that's what most of day 1 was like. There were scattered showers out there, but for the most part the boat was sunny. The only drawback was that it could get quite windy. There were 30 knot winds at times, plus the boat was traveling at about 18 knots... so the wind had a tendancy to swirly around on the deck pretty good, but not enough to make it feel cold.

My day of traveling and drinking, plus the stress of boarding the boat caught up with me finally and I just slept in till like 11 am on Day 3. Plus there isn't much to do on the boat when you're not at a port of call... 'course that's the idea. Everyone else spent the morning lounging around the sun deck, or in the spa.

The afternoon was more of the same: eating at the buffet, drinking (which was pretty much a perpetual constant thoughout the trip), laying in the sun, sweating in the spa...

That night was the 1st formal dinner, the Captain's Welcome Aboard dinner. We all dressed up and hit the main restaurant.



Dinner was *much* better the 2nd night. We guessed that the 1st night we're actually eating the left overs from the previous week's cruise since the food was not at all on par with what were were expecting. The 2nd night (and later dinners) were much better.

One trick with cruise eating: at the dinners, the cruise ship is stocked with enough food taht everyone can actually order one of each appitizer, once of each salad, one of each entre and one of each dessert. Of course not many people can eat that much, but most of us ended up ordering like 2 or 3 appetizers and 2 entries at every meal.

'Course some things aren't on the menu... like Glen's snack of butter off our waitress's hands.



After dinner we hit the casino and Glen, Dan and I threw the bones at the craps table. I played a single roller, who didn't seven-out for like 45 minutes and ended up walking away up $400. The only time I've ever really won any money gambling... but don't worry, I ended up giving it all back to Carnival eventually.

Day 3 Cliff notes:
Lots of sleeping, lounging, eating, spa-ing, followed by a formal dinner and a good night at the craps table.

[sperry]

Tuesday, Jan 4, 2005
Carribean Sea:

Sometime early on Day 4 we rounded the tip of Cuba and turned toward Jamaica. We were now in the Carribean Sea. The winds were a bit calmer, the water less choppy, and the temperature and humidity continued to rise. By now the piles of snow back in Reno were starting to seem made-up.

Today, Glen decided he was a pirate. The day was filled with yells of "YARRR!" and "AVAST!" and we drank rum almost exclusively. Pirate Glen acosted our new friend who works at the Duty Free shopping mall from New Zealand.



Then after dinner, Pirate Glen dressed up for the midnight deck party in full Johnny Depp style where he became "Captain Stabbin" and went certifibly Pirate Insane... more than even Pirate Steve.





However, Glen did win the costume contest for our team.



The night ended around 3am when Dan and I decided to sign up for a round of golf in Jamaica, since we were both still flush with our winnings from the previous night in the casino. Only $160, what a deal!

Day 4 Cliff notes:
Glen's a pirate.

[sperry]

Wednesday, Jan 5, 2005
Montego Bay, Jamaica:

7:15 am came early after partying late Tuesday night, but somehow Dan and I were able to drag ourselves down to the lobby to disembark ahead of the rest of the guests as part of the golf package we had signed up for just about 4 hours earlier. Unfortunately when I was rushing to pack my backpack for the day, I left my glasses and my sunglasses sitting on the desk in my room... I had tossed them in their cases, and put them on the desk so I could toss my camera into the bag, then just forgot to put them back in my bag.

Anyway, the golf package included rental clubs, which were brand-new Nike's, but were really not the best clubs, especially since I'm not used to using one of those paint-can on a stick sized drivers. It also included golf carts and caddies.

We dragged our clubs and our tired asses off the boat to a gorgeous, wet Jamaican morning. It had been raining quite a bit the few days before we arrived, and it was so humid that nothing had dried. We took a bus from the dock around the "highway" (a two lane road with no striping and a lot of traffic) to Rose Hall on the other side of the island, about a 45 minute drive. There we drove up a small private road to the top of hill where an old sugar plantation house serves as the club house for the White Witch golf course.

The story of "The White Witch" is one about a French woman that came to Jamaica in the 1700s to marry a rich sugar plantation owner. She eventually killed her husband, her next 2 husbands, and like 6 of her lovers, in addition to being a brutal slave owner. She was eventually killed by one of her slaves, and they say she still haunts Rose Hall. True or not, 200+ years later there's a golf course on her plantation, and Dan and I shot a round there.

The course was wet, and only dried out a little bit as the day progressed. Also, the morning was *very* windy, and mostly cloudy... but the clouds were actually a blessing, since I didn't have my sunglasses.



Dan and I hit the range. I was having issues with the clubs right away. Part of it was that I hadn't played in like a year, part of it was the wind, part of it was the lack of glasses, but most of it was that my game isn't as good as I wished it was. But I finally got my driver straightened out and we hit the 1st tee.



The theme for my golf game that day was inconsistancy. Mostly I was slicing the ball, but how much was variable, and occationally I'd hit a great, long, straight shot... 'course I was aiming way left to compensate for the slice, so it still wasn't all that great. It also sucked that Dan and our father/son pair are all better golfers than I. I like to keep at least one crappy player on my team so I feel better about my game. No matter however, because I was having a blast playing such a beautiful course.



One of the most challenging aspects of the course were the greens. They're bremuda grass which has a pronounced grain to it that affects the roll of the ball. Since I've never played bremuda greens, I was useless in reading them. They were also *very* fast compared to the greens that I'm used to playing. 3 or 4 putts were the standard, which really does a number on your score when you're not playing well off the tee. However, Michael our caddy was very adept at reading the greens since he's been doing it every day for three years. If you put it on the line he gave you, and got the speed right, you would make any put.

The signature hole for White Witch is the 16th. It's a par three, which like many of the holes on the course, has an elevated tee. Bunkers guard the green and there's a ravine to clear from the tee.



I didn't play that hole very well and shanked my 9 iron into the trees. And while they're not technically out of bounds, the underbrush in Jamaica is such that there's pretty much no way to ever find a ball off the fairway. In fact, I think I lost 11 balls in 18 holes... which explains my 104. Dan on the other hand followed a mediocre front 9 by shooting 1 under par on the back 9 with 2 birds and a bogey! We think it was the Red Stripe beer he had at the clubhouse at the turn.



Meanwhile, the rest of the crew headed out into Jamaica's little shops, getting their hair braided, buying illicit materials only to leave them behind, drinking Red Stripe Lights on the beach, and making fun of a poor wet donkey parked in the rain.











One the ride back from the course, I spotted some "cool" Jamaican rides, like this Honda and a few Toyota Levins, all right hand drive of course.





Once back on the ship, we regrouped on the sun deck to watch the ship leave Montego Bay, and headed back out into the Carribean at sun-set, headed west towards the Cayman Islands.






Day 6 Cliff notes:
Dan and I played golf all day while the rest of the crew checked out Montego Bay. There was a wet donkey.

[sperry]

Thursday, Jan 6, 2005
Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands:

We sailed into George Town, Grand Cayman at about 8 am on Thursday. Unfortunately, we were only given a short time on the island, and would have to be back on the boat by 4:30.

Grand Cayman really isn't much more than a large sand bar in the middle of the Carribean. In fact, from the boat you can see directly over the western part of the island to the ocean on the other side!



One of the drawbacks to such a small island is that when the hurricanes come, there's nothing to protect the buildings. What we could see of the island, pretty much everything was destroyed or damaged. All the trees were bent and leafless, all the smaller buildings were ruined, and most of the larger resorts and hotels all had at least roof damage.



Since the water is so shallow around the island, the cruise ship had to anchor off shore, and we took a ferry from the boat to the dock. Then we took a bus ride across the island to a smaller boat dock. We rode another ferry-style double decker boat out to "Stingray City" where we hit the water with masks and snorkles. There were like 100 to 200 people in the water there from the various cruise ships and just about as many stingrays. These alien looking fish thing were freaking the hell out of all the little kids. I dunno what kind of parents bring their kids to these places, but they should *at least* prepare the kids for the stingrays, since they are *huge* and quite creepy. I have to admit I even freaked out a bit when a 3' ray would sneak up from behind you and rub across your legs!







So we swam (well, more like "waded") with the rays for a bit, then we climbed back in the boat and headed to deeper water along the reef. There we added flippers to our equipment and got some real snorkling on. Hampered by my float vest, I ditched it on the boat allowing me to more easily dive in the ~10 foot deep water. In fact the water's so salty that half a lungfull of air is all it takes to float on the surface comfortably. The reef was littered with debris from the hurricane, and there weren't many brightly colored fish in the water. But it was fun swimming nonetheless, since the water was soo clear and warm. Glen and I think we spotted a barracuda swimming with us, but in hindsight, we think the snout may have been a little too narrow for a 'cuda, so we're not sure that's what it was now.

The boat took us back to the bus, where we convinced the bus driver to take us to a beach instead of taking us all the way back to the pier. At the beach we had to pay a stupid $5/person entrance fee (we later found out it was $35 if you had signed up for it on the ship!) and we felt screwed by the $4.75/beer price for Red Stripes. 'Course most of that was because we ordered two buckets at once, which was like $60 for beer! So, we took our over-priced beers and stole some beach chairs and sat in the sun. Cooling off was a short walk down the talcum-like sand to the water.





We played with some beachballs and accidentally lost the eyeball (yes, a beach ball that looks like and eyeball) in the wind. In about 30 seconds the ball was out past the buoys... we're hoping it finds an oil-rig or something in the middle of the Carribean so some worker will be like "hey Jose, is that a giant floating eyeball out there, or am I working too hard?"

Sunburnt and faded, we hitched a bus ride back to the boat. We tried to grab some more alcohol from the duty free shop, but it was too close to depart-time to buy anything, so we just took pictures with the Big Black Dick Rum mascot.



Juno and I hopped the ferry back to the boat while Glen went to find his shoes at the beach and Dan, Ryan and Courtney went shopping for a bit longer. We eventually all made it back on board for a 5 pm sail. Just before we departed I took a bunch of pictures for a 360 deg. panorama image of Grand Cayman.



That night was supposed to be the 2nd formal dinner, but everyone agreed that if we were going to bother dressing up, we were gona hit "The Point" restaurant, which is the nicest formal-only restaurant on board. This restaurant is the only not included place on the ship, so dinner cost us a flat $25/each + drinks. Dan, being our resident wine expert picked a bottle of wine and champagne for the group. I had sushi for an appetizer, and a massive tenderloin steak. Juno and Dan also had the same. The other 3 got the surf-n-turf lobster and fillet. This was easily the best meal we had on board.






Day 6 Cliff notes:
Grand Cayman was hammered by the summer hurricanes. We went wading with stingrays, snorkeling off the reef, and drank expensive Jamaican beer on the beach. We met a pirate with a big black dick, and at at the nicest restaurant on board.

[sperry]

Friday, Jan 7, 2005
Cozumel, Mexico:

The Cozumel port of call was the only one that didn't require getting up super early in the morning, so we didn't actually get off the boat till like 9 or 10 am. The weather was *awesome*... low 80's, but about 70% humidity so it felt really warm.

The port at Cozumel has a long building that passengers are required to walk through full of duty free crap. I tried my best Bono impression with some cheap-ass sunglasses.





I probably should have purchased 'em, because my Maui Jims broke a hinge in Cayman, so I was without sunglasses. However Juno was loaning me a pair of his, so I got by.

We took a bus ride to the mall, since that's where the cruise line drops off all the people that say "we want to go shopping". The mall was basically just like the same crap we've got in the States, with a Burger King and a Subway.

We didn't linger long, and hit the streets on foot. We headed away from the beach, towards the more "local" side of town. We were still inundated by all the same Cozumel crap, and even ended up buys some stuff. Glen got a gawdy "Cozumel" hat, Juno hit up some Cubans... etc. At least the shops have a sense of humor about their wares.



After a bit more walking around, we found a little restaurant to stop an have a beer at. Dos XX all around! We kicked it for a bit there.



As we were getting ready to leave, Glen asked about our host's T-Shirt. Apparently the local elections were coming up and Cozumel was fairly split between the two candidates for Governor. The restaurant owner was supporting this Felix guy who was "from the streets" and down with his people, while the "other guy" was "rich and corrupt". Glen bought a campaign T-Shirt from the guy.



Then it was more of the same... cruising the streets, checking out the shops, etc. We grabbed lunch in a restaurant that was on top of the shops. Someone in the group spotted it, and thought it would be a cool place, so we found the little stairway up there. Fish tacos weren't on the menu, but you can't go to Mexico w/o eating fish tacos, so we ordered them anyway.



Then we hitched a cab ride to the beach. The plan was to hit up Playa Azule, but the cabbie told us the beach next door was just as nice, and free to enter, so we went there instead.





Since some of us still had gifts to find for people back home, Juno and Dan decided to stay at the beach while the rest of us headed back into town. We found the last few trinkets we needed to wast our money on, and saw a bird drinking a coke.



Then it was back to the boat for dinner, which was no where nearly as good as the previous night's grub.



But our waitress showed us some suggestive napkin folding.



Day 7 Cliff notes:
Mucho shopping for junk in Cozumel's shops. Had beers w/ a guy who sold Glen an political T-Shirt. Ate fish tacos in a semi-local's restaurant. Swam at the beach. Glen got dirty w/ a napkin.

[sperry]

Saturday, Jan 8, 2005
Gulf of Mexico:

Saturday was our last "Fun Day at Sea", and our last oppertunity to screw around on the boat. Come Sunday morning, we were going to be hitting the port early in the morning.

So, as we headed across the Gulf towards New Orleans, under windy but still fairly warm skys, we did what we'd been doing all cruise long: sit in the sun and drink.



Everyone was pretty beat by this point, so I don't think anyone really missed having nothing to do but hang around the boat.

That night, we had one last dinner in the main dining room. There was some additional jackassery, since it was our last night... like the glass stacking Dan and I started on. Unfortunately, before we could really get going, one of the servers came over and took it apart.



Juno and Glen made sure to really drop the innuendos on our server...



Then, continuing the tradition we started on our last cruise, we made sure to sit our waitress down and server her for a change on the last night! Hopah!



Then as she signed our pictures of the ship (a little parting gift from the crew) Glen made sure to assault our server one last time.



After dinner we hit the piano bar a final time and had a few drinks, sang a few songs, and said goodbye to some of the people we had meet on the cruise.





Then it was off to bed!


Day 8 Cliff notes:
Laid back day, not much more than sitting around in the sun, drinking. Screwed around at dinner just a little bit more than usual. A quick stop at the piano bar, and an early retirement.

[sperry]

Sunday, Jan 9, 2005
Mississippi River; New Orleans, LA; Denver, CO; Reno, NV:

Having packed the night before and given our bags to the ship's crew, we were able to sleep in as late possible, then get up and grab our day-packs as the ship docked. The disembarkment procedure is fairly simple... they call the name of one of the decks at random (or so they said), and when your deck is called, you head down to the lobby on deck 3, and wait in a line to walk off the boat. No sweat. Unfortunately, they called like 4 decks before ours, but we were still off the boat fairly early.

Once we were back into the port (same one we left from) we got to wander through a maze of laid out baggage looking for our bags. You'd think they'd all be near each other, since all of our rooms were close together, but not only was that not the case, my two bags themselves were far apart! So after some digging, Glen found my missing bag, and we bounced for the exit.

Having filled out our customs paperwork the night before, we expected to have to wait in a line, get the paperwork reviewed, and pass a cursory search. Well, we did none of that. As we headed for the exit some port employees just grabbed our papers and let us keep on going for the door. I could have written down "I purchased $10M in Mexican jewelry", signed a fake name, and I don't think anyone would have questioned it.

Once outside the port, we found all the people from the 4 decks that were called before us, all waiting for cabs and busses to the airport. Since we didn't want to try to wait for the bus that we took to get to the port on the 1st day, we just followed Glen's lead and walked up and stood next to the cab line. Like clockwork, the security guard that was there directing traffic yelled at us and made us "get back into line", letting us know that he'd call us for the next cab. And so we pushed ourselves over in front of the cab line (and not a single person said anything!?!) and in about 20 seconds we were called for a cab.

The cab ride was quick (remember Glen only lives a few blocks from the port) but in contrast to the $3 and $4 cab rides in Jamaica and Mexico, this one was like $5 each! Stupid American prices. But it sure beat walking, as a light drizzle was falling.

Back at Glen's house we all cleaned ourselves up a bit, then piled into the Caddy for a ride over to the Garden District. Glen pointed out parts of the Mardi Gras parade route and showed us a bit of the city on the way. Our destination was the Commander's Palace restaurant. Converted from and old-school house to a restaurant in 1880, this place is a kick-ass restaurant with a bunch of history.



Lunch was top-shelf, and the meal ranks in the top 4 for best meals I've ever had (the other 3 were from my last trip to N.O.) I'm seriously jealous that Glen can eat like that whenever he feels like it... 'course if I lived there, I'd turn into a massive fat-ass from all the food.

Back at Glen's after lunch I had enough time to change into some less formal clothes for traveling, burn copies of everyone's digital pictures, and kick it for a few before we were off to the airport. Everyone else was staying for another day, but I had work on Monday, so my flight was leaving Sunday afternoon. Glen let me drive the pimp-ride to the airport. I have to say, for a big car, that thing can move! Plus, you can't beat the interior of a Caddy... it's like the Cadilliac of cars!

My flights went off without a hitch, in contrast to my trip out. I even lucked out and got seats on both flights within the 1st 8 rows, which are the business class seats. I'll tell you, when you're 6'4", an extra few inches of leg room is a *huge* increase in comfort! The only thing that sucked was landing in Reno. It was about 9pm, but the whole city was lit up with light reflecting off the cloud cover and the snow... holy crap the snow! It was piled everywhere, worse than when I left. I later found out that I missed the biggest storm of the year. So, while it was nice laying on the beach while everyone else was getting pummeled by snow, it certainly made coming back home that much harder.


Day 9 Cliff notes:
Disembarked with minimal issues. Took a quick car tour of New Orleans. Ate lunch at Commander's. Had a good flight home, back to Antartica.

[doubleurx]

Awesome trip. You went at just the right time. Everyone that reads this post is jealous!

Welcome back to the snow.

[dknv]

Sounds like hella fun.

Did you lose your glasses?

Welcome back!

[skimonkey30]

Glad you had a good time! I hate Dallas Fort Worth Airport I've had to run through that airport as well and it sucks! I leave for London on Thursday and thank god I have a non-stop out of SFO!!

[BOO]

As I am scrolling thru the pictures i am wondering the same thing.. and then a saying pop's into my head...
DUDE, Where's my glasses? ..


Welcome back to slushy land sperry!!!!

[BOO]

And by the way scott.. my daughter says in that picture (The picture where its you and the 2 drunk chics) YOU look like Matt Damon..

<--Sperry.. Mr. Cool according to my daughter .... lol

[Tonanator]

Sounds like you had a great time but where's the cruise pics and details?
I think we have all ran a miracle mile at DFW at one time or another. Maybe those carts should be turboed.

[sperry]

I'm still working on the rest of the trip... it's hard to find one or two pics to illustrate the story out of the 1.2GBs I've got.

I ditched the glasses for most of the trip during the day... simply to avoid breaking or losing them and to allow easier on/off of the sunglasses. If I don't put them on 1st thing in the morning, I can get by, but if I'm wearing them, then take 'em off I'm totally blind.

I'll talk more about the glasses when I get to filling out the story from Jamaica.

[JC]

I read something about you and dede sleeping and puking, bling, then pics of ugly half naked women, then some dude without his shirt on. Interesting trip so far.

[sperry]

Originally Posted by JC

I read something about you and dede sleeping and puking, bling, then pics of ugly half naked women, then some dude without his shirt on. Interesting trip so far.

JC's Cliff Notes > Sperry's Cliff Notes

[MikeK]

I am teh jealous!

The airport story is funny, especially the part about running past 27 gates before a cart shows up to drive you the last 40 ft

[MattR]

Hahaha! Glen is an animal, you were not kidding..Looks like a good time though man. Cant wait to see the rest.

[qksubi]

Im glad you had a good time man!! I think you needed a vacation form all the rants that you have been going on

[AtomicLabMonkey]

Wish we could have been there. Sounds like another cruise in the tradition I remember.

[sonicsuby]

Nice, man! The chick on your left in the day 1 drunk chick pic has some nice...assets

[sperry]

Originally Posted by sonicsuby

Nice, man! The chick on your left in the day 1 drunk chick pic has some nice...assets

Yeah, that chick is HOT... plus she's got a bit of a Cajun accent, which is even hotter. I'm pretty sure my friend Glen is hitting that... cuz, well that's what Glen does.

[AtomicLabMonkey]

Originally Posted by sperry

Yeah, that chick is HOT... plus she's got a bit of a Cajun accent, which is even hotter. I'm pretty sure my friend Glen is hitting that... cuz, well that's what Glen does.

Is that the neighbor he was saying had the brand new fake titties? And yeah, I'm sure he's hit it already.